Vol.13 No.6

Children In Crisis
We can’t redefine the family without damaging its most vulnerable members—children.
By Rita Kirimaua

At age seven, Jill (not her real name) saw her father kissing another man at the front door. She was left confused and desperate for an explanation.

Three years later, Jill’s parents divorced and her father moved in with his boyfriend. Jill and her brother had to visit their father every other weekend. It was a time when she had “self-destructive values” imposed on her. “It was beyond what I could handle,” she recalls.¹

During her teens, she was sexually active, had two abortions, and experimented with drugs, as she struggled to validate her own sexual orientation. Adding to her confusion was the reality that she and her father were attracted to the same teenage boys. Her brother was also traumatized because he was sexually abused by two of her father’s friends.²

Although startling, this scenario is happening to a growing number of children in modern societies where there is a significant redefinition of the traditional family.

Attack on Civilization

Traditionally, marriage has been confined to the union of one man and one woman. God instituted marriage in the Garden of Eden. Through marriage a man and a woman were to “be fruitful and multiply.” Genesis 1:28. To redefine marriage not only destroys civilization’s most time-honored institution—the family—it also nullifies God’s authority as Supreme Creator. Yet, this is precisely what modern society is doing.

On March 9, 2003, the Netherlands became the first country to legalize same–sex marriages. The day was marked by a mass wedding of gays and lesbians at Amsterdam Town Hall, overseen by the city’s mayor. The law was approved in the Dutch Senate last December by a vote of 49 to 26. A prerequisite for the marriage license required at least one partner to be a Dutch citizen or resident and the other partner to be a national of any country. It did not matter if the other partner’s country recognized the union. ³

This step was logical because, in 1988, the Netherlands granted same-sex partnerships legal registration, recognizing their union with privileges similar to those of marriage. Since then, over 9,000 couples have registered. The law now allows those who registered to change their status to married, if they desire. ⁴

This year, Belgium also overruled the definition of a traditional family and voted to legalize same-sex marriage. Before the law passed, Belgian Justice Minister Marc Verwilghen, said: “Mentalities have changed. There is no longer any reason not to open it [marriage] to people of the same sex.”⁵

In Portugal, a predominantly Roman Catholic country, same-sex couples who have lived together for two years, are now given the same privileges as heterosexual, common-law couples. Germany is on the brink of giving “life partners” some marriage status rights. And same-sex adoptions are already legal in Denmark.⁶

What about America?

No American state has legalized same-sex marriage, but some states have ensured certain “benefits to domestic partners” such as healthcare and pensions. In a legal effort to preserve traditional marriage between one man and one woman, thirty-six states have banned same-sex marriages under the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA ). Although these states have stood firmly against same-sex marriage, certain circumstances have created a tolerant climate for it.⁷

So where do Christians draw the line?

Stephen Crittenden, who presents “The Religion Report” on ABC Radio National, writes: “In the case of the Protestant churches, the homosexual ‘agenda’ is seen as a direct threat to biblical authority.…” Marcus Borg, one of America’s leading Bible scholars, notes that biblical literalism is declining rapidly, and one reason the fundamentalist voice is so persistent is “because fundamentalists and conservative evangelicals are aware that they are losing the battle for the Bible.”⁸

But the issue goes deeper. Borg, according to reports, says that “the Bible has become the battleground between liberals and conservatives in the Protestant churches, with the same people lining up together over three main issues of interpretation: the creation myth in Genesis, the nature of Jesus, and homosexuality.” E. Michael Jones, editor of Culture Wars, a conservative Catholic magazine, said: “Basically they [progressives] won every battle up until the homosexual battle, and the homosexual battle is in many ways the last frontier.”⁹

Our society is reflecting the fact that as modern “progress” gets welcomed through the front door, moral absolutes get thrown out the back.

Effects on Children

Children suffer from society’s lack of moral ethics. Marching hand in hand with same-sex marriage legalities comes the “right” to adopt children, regardless of the fact that nature has for centuries required a mother and a father figure.

Because she wasn’t adopted, Jill didn’t have to deal with the insecurities of not knowing her biological father. She loved her father, regardless of his immoral lifestyle, as any child would. But she didn’t know what was absolutely wrong or right and, as a result, struggled with her own sexuality.

 “My dad loved me, and he was always trying to do what was best for me while living his life the way he wanted to. I was loved, but I was in a very sick family and have suffered greatly as an adult because of it.”

Today, Jill is a Christian, married, and has her own daughter. She says it takes more than love to be a proper parent. Having grown up in a homosexual environment, Jill refutes gay-adoption advocates that say only “love makes a family.” She questions, “why would we put a child in a home with two people who cannot relate to the opposite sex?”¹⁰

In spite of her experience, Jill has made reconciliation with her father and even won his support against homosexual adoption. “My father and I agree,” she says. “If you put children’s well-being first, homosexuality and raising healthy children exclude each other.”¹¹

Same-sex Adoption

In February 2002, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) released a report supporting legalized adoption of children by same-sex couples. The Abstract of the report states: “Children who are born to or adopted by 1 member of a same-sex couple deserve the security of 2 legally recognized parents. Therefore, the American Academy of Pediatrics supports legislative and legal efforts to provide the possibility of adoption of the child by the second parent or coparent in these families.”¹²

The controversial report brought strong reactions—for and against. Rosie O’Donnell, TV talk show host who admits being a lesbian, praised the statement. She has adopted several children.¹³

But Bob Mann, M.D., a practicing pediatrician and Fellow of the AAP, wrote in an open letter: “As chairman of the Physicians Resource Council…we have decided to call upon the AAP to rescind its statement.…This current research has fatal flaws, a fact the statement’s authors acknowledge and then proceed to ignore. Most of the studies are fraught with problems, such as inadequate sample size, biased sample selection, lack of proper controls or failure to account for confounding variables.”

 Mann also observed: “If the Academy is going to promote this policy it ought to know beyond any doubt just how this decision would affect the welfare of children. And in the absence of conclusive evidence showing that parenting outcomes are the same between same-sex and heterosexual parents, the Academy should remain silent.”¹⁴

Dr. William J. Maier, a child and family psychologist, responded that, “this decision defies what decades of research confirm—that children do best when there is a mother and father, married to one another, in a home. Parenting is more than the random contributions of any configuration of people. Both mothers and fathers provide unique and irreplaceable contributions. Children desperately need this balance—and no amount of political posturing can change that.”¹⁵

Signs of the End

“This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

For men shall be lovers of their own selves…Without natural affection…lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God.” 2 Timothy 3:1-4.

Did the Apostle Paul know about the same-sex agenda? No, but he knew that immoral societies would be pervasive just before Christ’s Second Coming.

Christ said: “But the same day that Lot went out of Sodom it rained fire and brimstone from heaven, and destroyed them all. Even thus shall it be in the day when the Son of man is revealed.” Luke 17:29, 30.

Lot was warned to leave Sodom because of its wickedness and prevailing homosexuality. Genesis, Chapter 19. The men of Sodom were without natural affection. Learning that Lot had male guests, they attacked his house, yelling, “Where are the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.” Verse 5. “Know” in this context of the Hebrew text, means to have sexual relations. See Genesis 4:1.

Historically, the Bible indicates that sexual perversions mark the downward slide of cultures:

“For this cause God gave them up into vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; Being filled with all unrighteousness… without natural affection …” Romans 1: 26-31.

The current predominance of homosexuality in the world and its insidious attack on morality, indicate that Christ’s Second Coming and the world’s destruction are near.

What Can You Do?

As Christians, we cannot remain silent while our civilization is being attacked at such vulnerable, crucial levels as traditional marriage and family. We should also recognize that many traditional marriages do not offer the stability and love that children need. Only as a married man and woman share self-sacrificing love between each other and with their children can they truly raise secure children.

God can and will protect what He has ordained. And His grace is more than sufficient to enable parents to raise the next generation of citizens.

References

1. Scott DeNicole, “When Love is Not Enough,” Citizen, June 1998.
2. Ibid.
3. CNSNews.com, March 4, 2003 “Dutch Legalize Same-Sex Marriages,”
4. Ibid.
5. Ibid.
6. www.smh.com.au/articles, January 31, 2003, “Same sex marriages: Belgium says ‘We Do.’”
7. kpeterson@stateline.org, “Same-Sex Couples Seek Marriage Rights,”December 19, 2002.
8. Stephen Crittenden, “As Churches Argue about Homosexuality, the Congregation Has Moved On,” Sydney Morning Herald, March 3, 2003.
9. Ibid.
10. See Reference 1.
11. Ibid.
12. Pediatrics, Vol. 109, No. 3, February 2002, “Technical Report: Coparent or Second-Parent Adoption by Same-Sex Parents.”
13. www.family.org/cforum/feature, “Rosie O’Donnell, the AAP and Homosexual Adoption.”
14. www.family.org/physmag/issues, June 2002, “An Open Letter to the AAP.”
15. www.famliy.org/welcom/pres, February 1, 2002, Press Room, “Focus on the Family Denounces Group’s Support for Gay Adoption.”

Rita Kirimaua, from Hawaii, is a Christian Education major at Hartland College. Last Generation staff members also contributed to this article.